I'm Baaaack!

The last post I said that I was wasted tired and would repost something…it never happened and now I don’t remember what I was going to do! Nothing like proving the point about being tired! Sorry, guys. 

The past few posts have been about chronic illness—not my favorite topic! So now I want to move us back to the subject of sensitivity (which makes all those chronic issues worse, by the way.)

I work on another blog, www.joystarters.com and I posted a piece over there that I’d like you to look at. It gets into what it is behind some people’s urge to “fix” people rather than to either let them be who they are or listen to God to hear what He has to say about their situation. It is called Fixers—What Was God Thinking!  a new one will be up but you can find it in the “recent posts” just to the right. It’s worth the read.

Blessings, Carol…making it plain

Author of The Mystery of Spiritual Sensitivity and Highly Sensitive

What does recovery look like?

 

Photo courtesy of Edna San Miguel

Recovery is a big part of life for people with chronic illness. To help you understand what recovery looks like, I thought I would re-post a blog I did a few years ago. It really catches up where I am at right now. 

 Photo courtsey of Microsoft
The Lord dropped a business course in my lap--I knew it was from Him and I also KNEW that I was to apply to be part of it. Before receiving acceptance I was up to reason 25 that I would not be included in that select group. I have no business bones in my body--not one! At least not that I know about. My mind does not run in those directions. Business is a foreign language. I don't really have a business anyway--I'm just trying to sell my book to spread the message...consider that some of the symptoms you deal with may be due to high sensitivity. Of course, I would also like to recoup my investment.


Photo courtsey of Microsoft
I am into the last week of this course and my ability to endure has remained so I know God is supporting me in this. I only had two meltdowns in the first module. It cost me incredibly to twist my brain around to think business-speak. The second module was not so demanding--more like how I normally think. Now I am into the last module and about to send in my homework. I am wasted tired. 

 
So after I submit the homework, recovery is on the agenda and to express what recovery looks like, here is the re-post...
  
On Monday Morning
 

When I listen to Christian speakers, they will often build a concept, then to bring it from the abstract to where we live. They will say, "Now what does that look like on Monday morning?" Here is a word picture of what spiritual sensitivity can look like on a Monday morning. 

 

If life were like the wind....

      Some days would be hurricane gale forces.
      Some days would be refreshing gentle      

      breezes.
      Some days would just plain blow . . .
      And some days would blow your skirt up!

Today, Monday, this is what high sensitivity looks like at our house. I am sitting in my recliner looking out the window. The sky is blue; trees, lawns--everything else is vibrant green. Flowers are out in their glory; the breeze is making a lovely sound blowing through the trees. Birds are singing their little throats sore but rather than being out there soaking it all up, I am having a hard time moving. It is laundry day but it sits in its basket. I'll have writers group tonight but I'm not preparing for that either.

What is the matter? Why is it that my body does not respond to my passion for tidiness, for sharing what is on God's heart, and for writing? And what does spiritual sensitivity have to do with it?

This past week was a hurricane force wind. My husband had one of "those weeks... you know, where he gave 120%. I brace myself to survive those kind of weeks! Because of the oneness of spirit, I quite literally share the week with him! I'll find myself distracted or in intercession or distracted because of intercession--it's hard to concentrate, stay focused or accomplish much. 

I understand. God designed me to be able to carry some of David's burden so that he can function with clarity. That's part of what the marriage covenant is about--what it does--makes us one. Of course when I said "I do" I didn't have a clue about what I was signing up for! You can find more about how burden bearing works in marriage in The Mystery of Spiritual Sensitivity (http://www.fromgodsheart.com/). Sheesh! Why don't they tell us these things! 

Anyhow, I was looking forward to the refreshing gentle breeze of the weekend only to find that he had scheduled himself for an entire weekend webinar! Due to the size of our little apartment, I attended as well. It requires a huge outlay of energy to follow concepts that challenge both mind and spirit, even more energy when they had problems with audio!  Now add to that unexpected company for the weekend to view the webinar with us! Oy! The gentle breeze I was looking forward to developed a quick gust--it blew my skirt up and I was too pooped to even squeal! Anyone relate?

 Photo courtesy of Thrive

Being highly sensitive means I must now give myself grace, lots of grace. And...what does grace look like on Monday? Recharging batteries does not happen with a 15 minute break, it's more like a slow spring refilling with water after being drained. You just have to leave it alone and let it fill. Each day over the next few days my schedule will have several two or three hour blocks of time for watching my fern grow, listening to good worship music, and/or long conversations with my bf (Jesus) and long pauses where neither He nor I have anything to say. Oh, I might squeeze laundry in sometime this week. But I figure, as long as there is a clean set of undies in my hubby's drawer, we are golden!

How do you recharge your batteries? Is it okay for you to be kind to yourself? Or, does your list drive you?

Blessings, Carol...making it plain

www.fromgodsheart.com

www.joystarters.com

Interview with Amazon Bestselling Author Kimberly Rae

Sick & Tired,  if you are chronically ill, or know someone who is, you know what we are talking about when we say we are "sick and tired of being sick and tired!" Her launch is June 26--mark that date on your calendar. June 26 is her birthday so she is giving away goodies as well as launching her book.
Check  out her freebies at www.kimberlyrae.com after you read the interview!
 

 

 

Author Kimberly Rae has Addison’s disease, hypoglycemia, asthma and a cyst on her brain. She knows what it is like to live tired of dependence on medication, guilty over needing help, and frustrated over fielding the frequent comment, “But you don’t look sick!”

 

Her new book, Sick & Tired: Empathy, Encouragement, and Practical Help for those Suffering with Chronic Health Problems, along with its companion, Laughter for the Sick & Tired, are for the nearly 1 out of every 2 people in America who live with chronic illness.


Let’s find out more:   Welcome, Kimberly. Tell us why you wrote Sick & Tired. After having health problems for over 15 years, I wanted a book that was funny, empathetic, encouraging, and a reminder that God loved me and had a purpose for me despite my limitations and pain. I couldn’t find that book, so I wrote it! I want others to read my book as a safe place where they feel believed, understood, and where they find a few reasons to smile! 

 Why do you believe this book is needed? People with chronic illness struggle with feeling alone in a healthy world, trying to pretend they can keep up, worried others think they are lazy or making their condition up. They are frustrated over doctors who chalk up their symptoms to depression, as well as the very real emotions of discouragement that naturally accompany lingering pain or an illness they always have to fight but can never defeat.  People who suffer chronically need encouragement, help, and reasons to laugh! That’s what this book is for.  

What are some of the book topics?

• How to explain your condition with confidence.
• The real and important process of grieving your loss.
• What to do when you’re ready to snap.
• Freedom from the weight of what other people think.
• When the smallest activities become a major hassle.
• The loss of your old identity and the presence of this new person you may not like yet.

Moving forward.  

Who is Sick & Tired for?

1. Women who struggle feeling “less” due to chronic health problems and need to know they are not alone and there is help.
2. Anyone with chronic health problems (over 100 million people in our country).
3. Anyone who loves someone with chronic health problems (pretty much everybody else!)

For those who love someone with health problems, would this make a good gift for them?  I definitely think so! Here’s why: No one understands a health sufferer like a fellow sufferer, and a short gift book from a person with a health condition to people with health conditions is the perfect gift because:

• though many would like to go to a conference or seminar on chronic health conditions, most of us would end up being sick on that particular day.
• though sometimes it helps to talk about our feelings and struggles, at the time we are feeling them, often we just want to be alone rather than talking, so it’s good to have a book on hand
• it feels so good to know someone out there understands, and a book can remind us of that fact over and over again.
• it gives helpful advice that is always accessible. Lastly, sick people don’t get out much; they need to get their encouragement in ways that do not require personal interaction, like from books.”

When is your book due for release? It’s up for launch June 26, 2013, on my birthday!! I’m doing some giveaways for the event, so sign up for the newsletter at www.kimberlyrae.com if you want the exclusive offer! Check out Kimberly’s new release, Sick & Tired: Empathy, Encouragement, and Practical Help for those Suffering with Chronic Health Problems

Thank you Kimberly for sharing with us. If you would like to comment on Kimberly's posts feel free to do so below. I hope you have been encouraged by her courage and willingness to share. Kimberly also writes about human trafficing. She gets rather passionate about it, even! You can find out more about that on her website:  www.kimberlyrae.com

And for the highly sensitive these emotional and psychological issues cut deeply and profoundly mess with your mind, self-image and sense of worth. And yet God made you highly sensitive knowing that you would also become chronically ill. Let this be the place you air your thoughts and feelings about God, yourself and others. I'd love to hear from you. See you next week.

Blessings, Carol
Amazon Best Selling Author of The Mystery of Spiritual Sensitivity and Highly Sensitive
www.fromgodsheart.com
www.joystarters.com


P.S. You should also put your email address in that "follow" box up at the top, if you would please? Then my little blogger guy will notify you when there is a new posting. Thank you! : )

Excerpt from Sick &; Tired–Guest Post

Glad you are back!

 

I have characterized living with MS as like wrestling with an octopus. Just when you manage to subdue one tentacle, seven more appear!

 

If you live with a chronic illness you will resonate with what Kimberly has to say in this little excerpt from her book which launches June 26. It is available now through Amazon, but on June 26 you will be able to get the kindle edition free! I will publish the link for the freebie as soon as it is available.

 

 Now, more from Kimberly!

 

Sick & Tired: Empathy, Encouragement, and Practical Help for those Suffering with Chronic Health Problems

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. Mark Twain

Sometimes I want to slap a sticky note on my forehead that says, “I am sick. No, I don’t look sick at this moment. But I am not faking having a disease just because I’m not in a wheelchair, and I am not a freak.”

Now, I am aware walking around with a note like that on my head would actually put me in the freak category. Not to mention all those words would only fit on a Post-It note if I wrote it very, very small, and then people would have to get really close to me to read it, and that might just put me over the edge. I’m really into my personal space.

The thing is, I don’t like talking about having chronic health problems that interfere with my life. I don’t like the way people look down, over, and around me when they realize I have a chronic illness. Or worse yet, the suspicious way their eyes narrow when they decide it’s all in my head, or I’m a hypochondriac.

Why does it bother me to tell people I have health problems? Doesn’t everybody at some point? I suppose that’s the crux right there. For most people, the difference is in the “some point” part.

They have a problem. They go to the doctor. Doctor fixes it. Life moves on. It was a small, annoying inconvenience.

For me, and likely for you since you’re reading this, your problem is not so temporary. You’ve got it for life, or until science finds a cure, which for some diseases is as likely as winning the lottery when you haven’t even bought a ticket. So we make people nervous.

Instead, Americans spend billions trying to avoid anything that even smells like sickness. Our country has enough pills, vitamins, and herbal remedies to make you sick even if you started out healthy, or at least to make your urine turn neon yellow—which is an interesting phenomenon—though likely not worth all the money it took to make it happen.

I would like to trade in my health problems and be well again. I sometimes think that would be getting my life back. But the truth is, this is my life, and as I have come to (almost) accept that fact and make the best of it, I think there’s hope for me.

Maybe not to cease being a freak to some, but to cease seeing myself as a victim, as a traumatic case, or even as a lesser being because of my illness. That being the goal, maybe I’ll remove the hypothetical Post-It note from my forehead and put it in my back pocket, to be removed periodically and waved in people’s faces only when I’m having a tough day. It’s a start anyway.

 

Check out Sick & Tired today at Amazon.com! Also look for its companion book, Laughter for the Sick & Tired, on Amazon or on www.Kimberly Rae.com  

 

Blessings, Carol

Amazon Best Selling Author of The Mystery of Spiritual Sensitivity and Highly Sensitive

www.fromgodsheart.com

www.joystarters.com

 

P.S. Would you please fill in your email address in the "follow" box up at the top of the blog? Thank you! Hope to see you here again next week.

What Sick People Wish Healthy People Knew

 

I've been blogging about difficulties of living with MS but these are not problems unique to MS. Anyone with a chronic illness must cope with the same sorts of issues.

 

 

Today I want to introduce you to a friend, and fellow afflicted author, Kimberly Rae. She has been diagnosed with Addison’s disease. At this point doctors think it is relatively rare, but they used to think that of a lot of things. She is also diagnosed with several other ailments you will find listed at the end of this post. She is well acquainted with the full gamut of emotional/spiritual battles that chronic illness brings.

 

One of the things that is hard to deal with when you are chronically ill is well meaning advice on one hand and ignorance of chronic illness  on the other. I particularly liked Kimberly’s list!

 

Things Sick People Wish Healthy People Knew

With nearly one out of every two people having some kind of chronic condition, it is very likely that you either have a chronic illness or you love someone who does. Today's post has tips from people with chronic illness, things they wish healthy people would understand, compiled by Amazon bestselling author and Addison’s disease sufferer, Kimberly Rae.

Here's what real people with chronic illness have to say about what they wish healthy people knew...
Disclaimer: Each of these will not necessarily fit every chronically ill person, they are just to give an idea of what many may feel.

1. I don't want to be sick. If I could make it go away, I would.

 

2. I feel guilty for my limitations and need reassurance that I am still valuable.

3. I wish they would know how hard it is for me to plan ahead to do things. Also, just because I'm able to do things one day doesn't mean I can do them the next. The inconsistency and uncertainty...is the worst part, because I never know how I will feel from day to day.  

 

4. I wish the well friends realized that I cannot keep up the same level of activity when I am under the weather. My house is a mess; the spiders won't pay rent and the kitchen floor is adhesive. I've been MIA over the last 2 months or so--the only people who have contacted me (to see how I'm doing) are ones who have health issues of their own.

 

5. I wish they knew that we are not lazy. We want to participate in all the things they do, but sometimes our bodies just won't let us. Also, just because we don't look sick doesn't mean we aren't struggling with pain or fatigue.

 

6. If it weren't for facebook, I would have no friends at all. No one offers to help. No one comes around just to talk. I have lived in this place 3 years, not one person has visited me here. I can't clean by myself, I have trouble cooking every day (and hubby is so good about not insisting), grocery shopping takes all of my strength since I have to also carry it inside and put it away. I sometimes pray for an OCD friend who will be so aghast at the condition of my house that she will volunteer to help me. :)

 

7. If I say no to an activity or event, it is not personal. It's not that I don't want to go (I do!), and not that I'm avoiding those people; it's just that even fun things can be more than my body can handle sometimes.

 

8. I wish healthy people could accept that my condition is not going to go away. If you ask, “Are you feeling better?” I don’t know how to answer. Better as is not sick anymore? As in better than the last flare up? Better than this morning? Instead, I’d love to have you smile and say, “How are you feeling today?” Thanks.

 

If you have a chronic illness, what would you add to this list? A little understanding goes a long way, so don't be shy! (But with gentleness and respect, please.)

 

Kimberly Rae has Addison's disease, hypoglycemia, asthma, scoliosis, and a cyst on her brain. She loves helping others live joyfully despite chronic illness. She could never find the kind of book she wanted when she was recovering from a bout of whatever so she wrote it. Get your copy.

Check out her newest book, Sick & Tired, on Amazon, to be launched June 26^h, 2013! http://tinyurl.com/mj8utum and you can find her website here.

Book Trailer: www.kimberlyrae.com

Blessings, Carol                                                                                                                                  Best selling author of The Mystery of Spiritual Sensitivity and Highly Sensitive www.fromgodsheart.com                                                                                              www.joystarters.com

Which Way Is "OUT?"

Do you ever think about that verse, Romans 8:28, that says that God works all things to the good of them who love God and are called according to His purpose? When I was in the pit of depression my brain was not capable of imagining what that could look like.

 Later, when I was out, I realized that depressed people no longer bothered me. I was not afraid of catching it. I could sit with someone who was depressed and not become depressed. In fact, I was asked to go visit depressed people; that puzzled me until I realized that now I was safe to be with a depressed person. I could commiserate and empathize and if the person has the strength to look at me, they can see by my face that I am no longer there. God brought me out and the depressed person could begin to hope that they too could find a way out.

Now, having said that, I need to also say that since the MS my capacity has changed. The parameters of my playground had changed. I no longer have the stamina I had before and I cannot do many things. My body has a degree of brokenness, I've learned that I am different, but not ruined. I used to love to teach, but now even people's excitement to learn can leave me feeling drained. My capacity, my energy is different now. So I have turned to writing and have found it feeds me and has given me a way to still feel I contribute. I have also learned another good thing--to have compassion on myself. Most of the time I don't beat up on myself for not being able to do what I used to do. Now I am careful about social involvement and give support by phone or in writing rather than face to face time in the same room. And even that I have discovered, I need to do from time to time rather than daily or even weekly.

 

By showing me the way out of the pit God worked good out of a bad thing. Having experienced depression I can be kinder, more compassionate, and less judgmental of those who struggle with this. I can crawl down in the pit and sit with them and paint it purple. And now I can stand at the entrance to the pit with them and point the way out! I just can't do it for very long! : ) Those are good things that came about because of being in a bad place.

So, how DO you get out? The story of Elijah (First Kings 18-19) gives God's prescription for depression and burnout. Eat, sleep, and then put one foot in front of the other--for fourty days. In Elijah's case he got two rounds of the treatment! Evidently 40 days was not enough to restore Elijah and that is good to know. Each of us will have our own timetable so be kind to yourself. Do your best to not compare yourself to anyone. God always fits the prescription to the individual. Each of us is different so what happened for me to get out is not necessarily the way He will take you out. Each of us must find our particular way out.

However, Elijah's story gives us three things that all depressed people will need to do to walk out of the pit. I have added a fourth.

First Restore the Body...

Eat nutritious food. When you are depressed you need help--angels came, touched Elijah and fed him "angel food" and good, clean water. Both items probably had all kinds of micro nutrients and minterals to replace and stabalize his electrolites and whatever else was whacked out. Notice that the angel had to tell him to eat. Like an NFL player, he had physically put out with an intensity for an extended period. He needed a supernatural angel's version of Gator-aide. So, when God sends you an "angel" to help, do like Elijah and let them help.

Sleep. Some people can't sleep and others can't stop sleeping. Both extreems indicate a troubled system. If you are having trouble with sleep, please let someone know. Sleep is a blessing from God and is meant to restore you.

 

Move. After the sleep and the food, Elijah began his physical restoration training--a 40 day program to build back some stamina. I imagine that he talked with God as he walked; I would. I think he kept in touch with his trainer; God was so gentle with Elijah. Even the attitude ajustment that let him know he was not the only one who was faithful in Israel was gentle--no harsh condemnation. I think God saw that Elijah was still in a rather fragile state. He was well enough to do something but not well enough to do much of anything. God gave him an assignment, but also prescribed another 40 days of one foot in front of the other before he did any "prophet" work. This says to me that physical recovery takes a while and that does not bother God.

After you have some healthy food and rest, begin some mindless exercise like putting one foot in front of the other. In my experience there were not enough brain cells functioning to do anything more than that. Don't take on a rigorous exercise regimen,  like a synchronized dance class or something of that nature unless that is exactly what you need. I characterize it as having one or two brain cells functioning and you need more than that for some of those exercise classes. But each of us is different, so find an exercise that fits you but rebuilds the body and feeds the soul.

While you do this exercise that leaves your mind free, make the effort to keep in touch with God as Elijah did. In other words, talk to God even if it feels like He is not there. On the other hand, sometimes in depression it can feel so like God has abandonded you that you can't hear Him. Then it is easy to feel He doesn't want to talk to you. That is a feeling and sometimes feelings are accurate and sometimes they are not. God does want to talk with you.

 

Although, the Lord sent Elijah an angel, he sent a squirrel for Agnes Sansdford to watch. The Lord re-started her heart through that cute squirrel. What helps one can be different than what you need. Keep in touch with God as best you can, He is your trainer. Talk to Him even if it feels like He is not there.

A friend and I were talking this week about the recovery process. She gave me a benchmark for how to know when you are getting better. She said you know you are better when you actually SEE the cobwebs on your windowsill. You might not be able to do anything about them yet but that is okay. Before, you didn't even see them; so seeing them is improvement! There is hope.

 

 

Possible First Steps--

• Exercise as per God's direction
• Enjoy a cuppa and a healthy snack 
• Take a shower and a nap
• Watch the sun move across the lawn or the sun set or the moon rise. See something beautiful without demanding that you have an instant, dramatic WOW response because you may need to soak in beauty for a time before you feel a response.

Blessings,

 

Carol

Best Selling Author of The Mystery of Spiritual Sensitivity and Highly Sensitive

www.fromgodsheart.com

www.joystarters.com